Lankero
by Madame Kiksters
Summary: Lance had tried to find other ways to break the curse but they almost always involved either a blood sacrifice or some bullshit like "True Love's Kiss". Yeah. Like that would ever happen.


**Notes:**

**This is based on a tumblr post.**

**I took it as a challenge and... here it is. I hope you like it!**

**(See the end of the work for more notes.)**

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A prince leaned against the wooden railing of a bridge admiring the view of the clouds reflected in the water below. So mesmerized was he, that he failed to notice the malevolent presence approaching.

"Young prince," the haggard voice asked, "what is it you're admiring in the water so?"

Prince Lance spared the cloaked woman a glance before resuming his watching. "The clouds."

The newcomer froze. "The clouds?" She echoed back in disbelief. "You look down upon my kingdom to admire such things we will never have?"

At her clipped tone, Lance finally turned to inspect the stranger fully and his eyes widened at the site of glowing, yellow orbs peeking out from under her hood hatefully.

"You... You're the seawitch. Haggar!" The prince fell to his knees humbly in the hopes he might soothe the witch before she cursed him. "Forgive me, I-"

"Forgive you?" The witch paused, her hands crackling with energy that fizzled out after a moment. "Very well. I suppose it is only natural for a prince of humans to be as foolish as those he rules over."

Lance bowed his head. "Thank you, Haggar."

He lifted his head to give her a grateful smile before she turned around, but the witch misinterpreted the gesture.

Enraged at the audacity of this human to mock her forgiveness with a cocky grin, she cursed him to the world of monsters. Transforming him into a tentacle for his deceit.

While Lance processed what had happened to him, the witch disappeared over the railing and into the water below.

When Lance looked around, he found he could see, but not in any way he had before. The world appeared grey to him, and every sound around him highlighted an object. From the gulls screeching overhead, to the waves crashing against the structures in the water below.

He stood on shaky legs as he 'looked around', but when he tried to step forward, Lance toppled over.

When he looked down, he found his legs had become one mass... A mass that stretched all the way up his body and tapered into his 'head'.

"Oh, no. No no no nononono. This... This isn't happening. This isn't real," were the only thoughts racing through his mind.

Unfortunately for our poor hero, it was very real.

It had been a year or so since Lance had been transformed into a tentacle. He'd been forced to flee his kingdom when the guards found him slithering around his tattered royal garb, having just figured out how to move correctly.

It was hard being a tentacle in a world of humans and monsters. Lance was an oddity, that he was sure of. Even wearing an old discarded jacket didn't help him blend any better than before.

He'd taken residence in an old lighthouse for the past month. It was quickly becoming his favorite "home away from castle" as the saying goes (Lance was sure), and he was considering making it his base of operations as he hunted down the witch to get her to remove this curse.

He'd tried to find other ways, but they almost always involved either a blood sacrifice or some bullshit like "True Love's Kiss". Yeah. Like that would ever happen.

He was enjoying the feel of the waves crashing against the rocks far below the lighthouse when a figure was illuminated from above.

Swooping down upon him, a vampire landed in front of him with dagger-sharp claws pressed against where his throat would be.

"Who sent you?" The dark voice growled.

Lance couldn't see the face, but he could tell the vampire was male by the vibrations in his voice... That or it was a very deep-voiced woman.

"Eh washn't shent be ennywon!" (I wasn't sent by anyone!)

Somehow, the vampire understood him. The claws dug deeper, and Lance fought against the urge to curl away from the pain.

"Bullshit you weren't. Then why did you come all the way out here? I've been watching you. Waiting for you to leave. But you kept waiting for me. Admit it! People don't just take up residence in a lighthouse!"

Lance's head was spinning from all the accusations, but the last one stuck out to him as odd.

"Shen wut er yu doink heer?" (Then what are you doing here?)

"I'm... I..." The vampire's claws relaxed minutely before returning full force. "Quit trying to distract me. Answer my question!"

"Wish won?" (Which one?)

"All of them!"

And so, Lance explained his life story to a strange vampire in the hopes he wouldn't have his head separated from his body... Metaphorically speaking, since he lacked both a head and a body.

And the vampire, realizing he was threatening a cursed man (which was the equivalent to threatening a small child in monster terms), apologized for his actions and explained that he'd been cursed himself. By being bitten and turned into a vampire.

There was a feeling of mutual respect that grew between them in that moment. One that can only be shared by two individuals that have been cursed from the human realm they knew.

The vampire removed his clawed hand from threatening Lance and extended it in greeting. "Name's Keith."

Lance was glad he didn't have a nose, or he might have snorted at a vampire named Keith, and likely gotten himself into further trouble for the disrespect.

He leaned down and wrapped himself around Keith's hand carefully avoiding touching him with the suckers at the end of his... Himself? (It was weird to say you're using your tentacle when you are a tentacle Lance had decided long ago).

"Lankero." (Lance.)

Keith smiled, glad to finally have someone around that understood him... And that he didn't want to drain the blood out of. "Alright, Lankero. Nice to meet you."

Lance had long since given up trying to correct his name to Keith. The most he could do to try was variations of the word to Keith. Hopefully, he'd be able to tell him his real name someday.

Keith was an odd sort. He'd mope around the lighthouse when he wasn't talking to Lance and he'd leave one night a month, returning before dawn reeking of blood and looking absolutely miserable.

Lance had asked Keith before why he looked so down on those nights and received a vague 'you wouldn't understand' every time.

The first time Keith carried Lance, was when Lance had accidentally gotten himself wedged between the rocks on his way back from the ocean where he'd call out to the sea witch. (It was the only thing he could think to do without risking his life needlessly).

Keith had frantically searched for him upon his return when he'd discovered Lance missing.

Lance still remembered the way Keith's body trembled while he carried Lance up the rocks and back to the lighthouse.

When he asked Keith how long he'd been alone before he met Lance that night, Keith told him he couldn't remember.

After that night, Keith would sometimes ask if he could feel Lance's soft skin again. Lance suspected it was because he missed the warmth of others and never turned him down.

He couldn't imagine what would happen if he ever left on his search to return to normal and left Keith alone. He didn't want to.

But he certainly didn't want to be a tentacle forever.

One night, he had a grand idea.

"You want me to what?"

"If yu care mee shen wee cun shersh togesher!" (If you carry me, then we can search together!)

"Why would I carry you? It's not like I get anything out of it!" Lance could tell by the slight tremors in his voice that Keith was interested in the idea and was lying to save face.

Rather than call him on it, Lance let himself droop in disappointment. "Eh gekero eh hash to weave." (I guess I have to leave.)

Keith froze. "What? What do you mean?"

"Eh've gotta break my curkero. Don worr, eh'ww be back wen eh'm cerrd. If eh'm ever cerrd." (I've got to break my curse. Don't worry, I'll be back when I'm cured. If I'm ever cured.)

There was a pause as Keith thought frantically to find an answer he could use to keep Lance from leaving while also saving face. He twitched when he found it before standing straight with a smirk (Lance assumed from the tone of his voice.) "Why didn't you just say you wanted to find a way to break your curse? If that's all..." He hoisted Lance over his head and had him rest around his shoulders like a boa, "Then it would be cruel of me not to help!"

And so, Lance and Keith traveled this way every night they went out together.

An entire month passed, and Keith scooped Lance up and over his head like normal, only this time it was in tense silence. Lance didn't speak and instead waited for Keith to tell him what was wrong.

They travelled to a village a few miles away and wandered around until Keith began stalking after a man stumbling home from a bar. The streets were empty save for the three of them, and Lance wondered what Keith was planning to do to the man (though, he did have a sneaking suspicion).

Keith approached the man from behind and right as he was about to strike, the man turned bleary eyes towards them and froze.

His eyes locked on Lance and he screamed before tearing off in any direction away from the two monsters.

"What the..." Keith looked behind him in confusion at what could have scared the man and realized what it was when his chin brushed against soft, rubbery skin. "Lankero? When did you get here?"

"Yu brot mee herr, reember?" (You brought me here, remember?)

"Did I?" Keith pinched his chin contemplatively before the sound of distant laughter interrupted them.

The muffled voice of the drunk in one of the buildings reached them as he raved, "It'sh true! I shaw a monshter attackin a guy! It wash terrible and big! Hurry! We gotta go... shave... him." The sound of someone falling to the floor was met with even harder laughter and Keith decided it was time for he and Lance to leave.

He'd just have to come back the next day for a meal.

"Sho yur shad yu haf to hurrt peepoll? Ish shat wye yur sho mopee?" (So you're sad you have to hurt people? Is that why you're so mopey?)

"No! It's not like I kill anyone! I'm not like the other vampires!" Keith was shaking slightly. "I'm not."

"I no yur not, Keish. Yu arr gud. She besht even!" (I know you're not, Keith. You're good. The best even!)

Keith chuckled weakly, relieved to hear he was good from someone. That he wasn't like the monster that had turned him. "Thanks, Lankero."

After that, Keith seemed to get flustered any time he and Lance were touching. If Lance didn't know any better, he'd think Keith was crushing on him.

But he did know better. He was a monster, and Keith was just embarrassed now that Lance knew that he fed on people.

It was the spark the gave him his second greatest idea.

"Absolutely not."

"Wye not? Ish a gud ideaa!" (Why not? It's a good idea!)

"It's a horrible idea and you should have kept it to yourself."

"Can't yu jusht trrye it?" (Can't you just try it?)

"No."

"Ikero mye bwood not gud enuf? Ikero shat it?" (Is my blood not good enough? Is that it?)

"It's not that, and you know it."

Lance had never wished more than he did now that he had eyes he could roll. "Shen wut ikero it?" (Then what is it?)

"You're special." Keith admitted quietly.

Lance paused. "Wut do yu meen?" (What do you mean?)

Keith peeked at Lance helplessly. "I don't want you to hate me."

Lance curled around Keith's shoulders in the best imitation of a hug he could manage. "Eh cud never haat yu." (I could never hate you.)

Lance felt hands clutch at his back desperately.

"You say that. But then you'll be different when my teeth sink into you. You'll see me for what I am. A monster."

"Keish. Eh'm a monshter. Er did you ferget?" (Keith. I'm a monster. Or did you forget?)

"No!" Keith pulled away. "You are not a monster! You are good and pure and... and... and you've never hurt anyone!" His voice was almost a whisper when he finished. "I don't deserve you."

Lance didn't have a reply to that. How could he? Was Keith blind to his own goodness? He had to have been! Keith was way better than Lance could have ever hoped to be! Sure, he was a little rough around the edges, but inside he was so innocent Lance felt angry Keith had been cursed to become a creature of the night, doomed to live in shadow.

"Ish mee shat doeshn't desherve yu." (It's me that doesn't deserve you.) Lance finished aloud.

Keith looked up in surprise. "What are you saying, Lankero?"

"Ehm shaying… yur speshul Keish. Yur impertent to mee. And eh onlee want happinekero fer yu." (I'm saying… you're special, Keith. You're important to me. And I only want happiness for you.) Lance admitted bashfully.

Keith smiled. "You make me happy, Lankero. This time I've spent with you is the happiest I've been in years."

Lance wrapped himself around Keith once more and curled the tip of his 'head' inward, so he could safely rest against Keith's forehead. He felt Keith's breathing quicken and he began to pull away as those warm puffs of air grew closer to him.

Before he could pull away any further, he felt lips press against him.

Warmth coursed through his body, heating him up until he felt like he was burning from the inside in the most delightful way. He sucked in a breath as his world tilted.

"Lankero?"

Lance couldn't answer. Not before his body transformed back into his human self in a flash of sparkling blue light. He blinked, the world was suddenly in color and he could finally see Keith's wonderfully expressive eyes past more than vague shapes.

"Keith?"

The vampire shivered. "You… you changed back."

Lance laughed, scooping Keith up with his arms and spinning him around. "Isn't it great? We broke the curse!"

"Lankero! Stop!"

Lance froze and immediately set Keith down gently. "What's wrong?"

"You're naked!"

Lance looked down to find that, other than the jacket he'd found so long ago, he was essentially naked. "Sorry."

He removed his jacket and tied it around his waist to protect what little modesty he might have had left.

"So, what are you going to do now?" Keith asked quietly.

"What do you mean?"

"Well, you're back to normal. You don't have to hide here with me anymore." The vampire wrapped his arms around himself. "You're free."

"Free? You sound like you were keeping me prisoner here."

Keith shook his head. "No, I meant… you're free to leave and go enjoy a human life again."

"That's true."

Keith wilted at Lance's revelation and squeezed his eyes shut so he wouldn't have to watch Lance leave him behind. He startled when he felt Lance embrace him once more.

"But I'd be hard pressed to enjoy a human life without you in it."

"What… do you think you're going to stay here and we're just going to live happily ever after or something?"

"Yup!"

"I'm a vampire, you know. I could suck your blood any second."

"I distinctly remember asking you to do that a few minutes ago."

"We won't be able to go out into the sunlight together."

"Sunlight's for plants. I'm fine without it."

Keith's fingers shook where he was holding himself back from returning Lance's embrace. "I'm going to outlive you. By a lot."

Lance paused. Without pulling away, he offered, "If someday you decide you can't live without me, you have my express permission to turn me."

Keith's arms snaked around Lance's waist and squeezed almost painfully while his head rested against the other's chest.

"I love you."

"Well, obviously. Or else the curse wouldn't have broken!"

Keith pulled away with a scoff before Lance ducked his head and pecked him on the lips.

"I love you too."

Extra:

"By the way. My name's not Lankero. It's Lance."

Keith tilted his head. "You mean like the prince that went missing a few years back?"

"Exactly like the prince that went missing a few years ago."

It took a few minutes before Keith made the connection. He turned to Lance, sucking in a breath with his eyes widened in surprise. "You're the prince!"

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**Notes:**

**There you have it!**

**I hope it was sweet and fluffy for you but also silly enough to remain true to the source material!**


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